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Cry Me A Riverbend II

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Dr. Evil Restarts His War Machine

buzz
"I don't believe that man's ever been to medical school!"

Once there was a boy named Jeffrey -- New York.

Jeffrey enjoyed posting to the comments sections of Iraq-related bloggers. His comments were strange, outrageous, and hostile. Reading them was like injecting your brain with epoxy until it congealed and then stretching it out at arms length. They also had the added nutritious value of being mostly dead-on true.

I tend to be anal retentive. But Jeffrey would never retain his anus. His anus ran about totally without retention. There was something in Jeffrey's posts to the Comments of blogs that was similiar to Raed's posts. There's definitely a maniacal quality to them. The difference is that Jeffrey's comments were from an obvious desire to see Iraq free and prosperous, and Raed is a backer of tyranny in Iraq, Iran, and wherever you find it.

Jeffrey loved everything about the Iraqi bloggers and even conversed with Raed and Khalid Jarrar via email.

He used to post at the old Cry Me A Riverbend blog. Then when the site shut down due to implied threats, and as I started this one in answer to that, Jeffrey started the Jarrars Up a River blog. Blogging changed Jeffery. His blog posts became increasingly more lucid and straightforward. People remarked that it was hard to imagine that it was truly the same person that had posted the bizarre cursing responses in the comments sections. After a short while he even changed the name of his blog in an attempt to make it less personally in the Jarrars' faces. After toying with a couple names, he settled on Iraqi Bloggers Central.

After posting all summer, he declared he was going to stop blogging in protest of the MNF letting Sistani mediate a peace in Najaf rather than wiping out the Muqtada mob of thugs. But it seemed to me that the truth was Jeffrey was tired. He was a teacher, school had started, and blogging can be all-consuming...especially the way he does it. So the posts at IBC ceased and the inimitable Jeffrey was silenced.

But recently...maybe it was Raed's decision to provide comments on his blog....Jeffery emerged from his spiderhole into the Comment sections. At first it was Blogger Jeffrey. the reasonable critiquer of Iraqi opinion. But soon.... Comment Jeffrey was back!

EVERYONE JOIN IN! SLIP ON YOUR BLACK PAJAMAS! HOIST THE FAMILY AK! LET'S ALL DO THE AK-DANCE! DANCE! DANCE! DANCE! "Hey, there's Al-Jazeera! We're going to be on TV!" DANCE! (He he.)
Jeffrey -- New York
I would say pull your panties out of the crack of your ass, but I don't think they make panties with burlap.He he.
Jeffrey -- New York

And then, it happened. In response to someone's comment about Jeffrey's silenced blog, he wrote:

Yes, I can think of a few others besides yourself who sighed with relief when I suspended major operations, unfurled my "Successful Evisceration" banner, and flew onto that floating carrier in my crotch-itching flight suit. However, I wonder if you have seen any of the Austin Powers flicks? If I resemble anyone on this beauteous orb it would be Doctor Evil. Drip. Drip. Drip. Oh-oh. It seems I'm starting to thaw.
Jeffrey -- New York

Dr. Evil's war machine is now up again and thrumming like a planet-sized kitten.

CMAR II says "check it out."

1 Comments:

  • CMAR II,

    That is a very good summary. You really did your research to pick out those excerpts. I know how much work that is. Excellent.

    Hey, since people have been wondering about Riverbend lately, I'm going to link to your pieces you did over the summer on Riverbend. I still think there the best we have right now.

    Yeah, I'm still fixing the sidebar and you're on with the other friends of Iraqi Bloggers Central.

    *

    By Blogger Jeffrey, at 10:08 PM  

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